Bing Bang Buy

Although I only have one product for sale, my Cafepress shop is finally up and running! Check it out, and buy a bumper sticker while you're at it. You'll be glad you did!

VF5 on X360

Sony takes a bit of a hit with this announcement today:

SAN FRANCISCO & LONDON (December 21, 2006) – SEGA® of America, Inc. and SEGA Europe Ltd. today announced that the highly anticipated arcade fighting game, Virtua Fighter™ 5, will make its way onto the Xbox 360™ video game and entertainment system.

People were wondering if VF5 would be a Sony exclusive. Now we know. Will this help move more Xboxes in Japan?

Rogue Galaxy

Man, I thought this game was coming out sooner. Rogue Galaxy is a little over a month away, and IGN has posted a 15-minute game intro movie (in three parts) that showcases the game's cool setting and high production value. Not to mention some delicious combat.


The same company behind Dragon Quest VIII, Level 5, is responsible for Rogue Galaxy. The character designs and voice acting seem to be on par with that awesome game, so I'm hoping for something similar here. Why buy a PS3 when your PS2 is still so viable? And we're not just talking new games; used PS2 games are now going for super cheap to make way for the current gen crop. And God of War II isn't even out yet! This PS2 baby still has some serious life in her.

Tii-Shirt

Put your Mii on a Tii, thanks to Mr. Cloud. That is seriously nitt.

Blue Dragon

Joystiq reports that Microsoft's Blue Dragon title debuted at #4 on the Japanese software sales charts. This is a nice little win for Microsoft, especially considering the apathy I witnessed in Tokyo regarding the game. But over the last few weeks, we've been seing the interest in Blue Dragon growing as Japanese launch drew closer. Now it's obvious that there's some significant desire for the game. Questions: a) is the game any good? and b) will it sell X360s? I guess we will see. But look for Dragon Quest IX (the other series with Akira Toriyama character designs that has "dragon" in the title but isn't "Dragon Ball" or "Dragon Ball Z") to kill the hell out of everything in Tokyo when it comes out for the DS. I want it!

Bigger Sausage

From my inbox this morning:

Yo dude

You Love Big tits? But Girls love big ramrod!

If you don't have one - GET ONE!

Not only a larger sausage will make you feel better, it will make you look better!

Get a months supply and see the difference!

No Pumps! No Surgery! No Exercises!

100% Guaranteed Safe Results Or Your Money Back!

Sigh.

New Mass Effect Video

BioWare has posted a new video that reveals some cool details about the upcoming Mass Effect. For instance, the combat system looks pretty robust and action-packed. And, boy, are those eyeballs reflective! Yes, this is the game that will sell me on the X360.

Mission in Snowdriftland

Nintendo is on a roll...with a snowball. Check out Mission in Snowdriftland, a winter-themed web game that seems to come out of nowhere. I love the purple protoplasm dude with glasses!

Hilariious

An entire site devoted to things broken by flying Wii remotes! TV's, windows, glasses...you name it. Fantastic.

Thanks to Gary for link!

Wii Play

And you thought Wii tennis was fun?

This is from Wii Play, a game already out in Japan. (According to IGN, it shipped with an extra remote, for multiplayer.) Ping pong, billiards, air hockey, tanks, a whole bunch of stuff. When can Wii get our hands on this, Nintendo?!?

Wee Wii Reviews

The Wii continues to bring the good grin fun times. Not only am I trading Miis with my friend Mark, but I'm enjoying the hell out of some Zelda. Here are remarks on some of the other launch titles that I've played/got my hands on:

Rayman Raving Rabbids: Believe the reviews. This is NOT a Rayman game. It is a collection of mini-games -- which range from so-so to fun -- starring bizarre rabbit creatures. The rabbits themselves are hilarious: half-homicidal/half-retarded fuzzballs with great animations and SFX. Haven't played much of the game, but it's frustrating that you must unlock the mini-games in single-player before you can play them in multi-player. (Not good for parties!) The mini-games themselves use the Wii controls to varying degrees of success. Coolest by far are the on-rails "plunger shooting" levels, which combine the best aspects of the game (funny characters with pick-up-and-play game design) for smiles galore. Raving Rabbids is fast food, albeit high quality fast food. Nice to look at, fun to play, a good showcase for the Wii...ultimately forgettable.

Excite Truck: TOTALLY fun. The driving is a cartoony, physics-bending experience, which makes the decision to depict the trucks realistically all the more bizarre. But whatever. Go wild with insane jumps, tricks and turns. The controls take a bit of getting used to, but work great. Be warned: this game is HARD. Like, even the early levels are tough. Much better in multiplayer, where the odds are smoothed out. Here is an awesome design decision: the truck that comes in first doesn't always win the race. Players collect stars as they go through the track, by performing tricks, good jumps, etc. Granted, you get a lot of stars for coming in first, but if you can accumulate more by racing well, you can still win. Makes for a real challenge that balances skill with speed.

Trauma Center Second Opinion: I did not play this game on the DS, but I can see how it would work perfectly with that platform. It also works great on the Wii. This is a hospital/surgery sim with a soap opera storyline. The oh-so Japanese narrative hysterics are bad to the point of entertaining. As for gameplay, you will be surprised how quickly you can get into it. The game is really just an exercise in muscle memory and sequence memorization; the surgery theme is only a motif. (The gameplay mechanic could easily work with cooking, or construction, or manufacturing radioactive isotopes, whatever.) The fun comes in when you have to remember complicated sequences while working against the clock (stressful!), all while using the Wii remote to slice, move, suture, etc. Our group was entertained for hours. But I wouldn't buy this game. Note: the graphics are poor.

DBZ Tenkaichi 2: Wow. This game is good. It feels like you are playing a DBZ episode. The graphics are solid and the character selection (over 100 characters) is insane. If you're a DBZ fan, you will LOVE this. The Wii controls are a bit wonky, and I assume this is a result of multi-platform development. (You can also play the game with the retro controller.) I've played previous DBZ fighting games, most of which were mediocre to decent, but this one really captures the kinetic vibe of the show. I may just pick this one up.

Well, back to Zelda. And Red Steel. (I still stand by my assertion that this game is not as bad as everyone claims it is. Grab a bargain copy when you can. I hear a sequel is on the way.) Oh, and let's not forget Wii Sports -- make sure you try the training mode in bowling! You can try to knock down 100 pins at once!

PS3 vs. Wii

Last week, the Wall Street Journal weighed in on the Sony vs. Nintendo debate, and came up with a shocking realization: "For mainstream users, who lack the skill or patience or interest for complex videogames, the Wii is the way to go. For hard-core gamers, the PS3 will be the one you want, but only if you are willing to part with a lot of money."

Donk!

There's a beer I tried over Thanksgiving from Belgium called Corsendonk. It was delicious! Beer Advocate gives it a good score. Silly name, though!

When Game Ads Go Bad

This hilarious series of bad game ads is brought to you by writer Scott Sharkey and the folks at 1up. My favorite is the tagline for Crossfire on the Genesis: "Crash Them To Pieces!"

Wii Are Online (Sort Of)

On Sunday night, I tried to get my Wii online. It easily found my router (Linksys), but could not connect to the Internet. I followed Nintendo's support suggestion, and upgraded the router's firmware last night. (Like I know what the fuck that means.) Eureka! It worked. The Wii found that pesky Internet and started downloading system updates. Gee, that download was slow...oops, Wii have lost the connection. Try again later, please!

Apparently, Nintendo's servers are getting crushed by traffic. Couldn't they have seen this coming?

Wii Deliver(s)!

The Nintendo hype machine promised to deliver an awesome gaming experience for everyone, and from what I can tell, they are positioned to do just that.

I got my hands on a delicious new Wii (thanks, Danny!) over the holiday wii-kend, and in one word: AWESOME. Even though I have been to multiple gaming conventions over the past year, I never actually got to play the Wii until Thanksgiving Day. Needless to say, it is everything that you have already read in countless blogs and magazines: intuitive, fun, revolutionary, simple, amazing. And don't just take my word for it; my in-laws had a blast playing Wii Tennis and Wii Bowling, and they wouldn't know the difference between an Octorok and a Goomba! Even my mom bowled a strike in Wii Bowling on her first try.

This goes a long way towards proving that an unthreatening interface, combined with elegant desgin, can bring new people into the gaming fold. Isn't this precisely what Nintendo has been talking about? I was skeptical at first, but now that I've played it, I'm a beliiver.

Here are some thoughts about the games I've tried:

Zelda: You just can't improve on the perfect formula, and this is both a good and bad thing. Twilight Princess does justice to its esteemed pedigree, making it a must-buy. If I were to quibble with anything here, it's that the game doesn't really take much advantage of the new controller. This is probably explained by the fact that the title was originally developed for the Gamecube, and is in fact coming out for that platform early next year. So I can't imagine the headaches if Nintendo really went full tilt with the Wiimote interface. But that aside, this game is just superb. Perfect controls (the aiming works great), awesome story (despite the familiar light/dark world hokum), lush graphics (enough bloom lighting already!) and that quintessential Nintendo magic -- Zelda has it all and then some.

Wii Sports: The best launch title ever? Not only is this game a great showcase for the Wii controller, but it does an amazing job of bringing new gamers to the proverbial table. Sure, baseball is way too simple, but does my mother-in-law want to worry about complicated fielding maneuvers? (The game performs these automatically.) Even boxing, which has been getting some lukewarm response, is really fun despite the unreliable controls. The true standouts are bowling and tennis, the latter of which is so much fun, you could probably play it for hours with your friends. I can't even imagine simultaneous four-player matches! You could OD on the Wii madness.

Red Steel: I've only played a little bit of Red Steel, but I enjoyed it. Yes, the controls are a bit goofy. But I look at it as a good start. Frankly, FPS games have become so cookie-cutter that I'm just pleased to try something different. The real challenge is preventing arm fatigue, something I've also heard about in response to Call of Duty. Even though your character in Red Steel probably looks like a total nutjob as he flails his gun hand around all over the damn place, the game is still a good time experience. Ubisoft, as usual, delivers top-notch production value and some really great (if only half-realized) ideas. I look forward to seeing this genre evolve on the Wii in the next six months or so.

That's it for now!

Sony: Uh-Oh

Well, the New York Times is decidedly underwowed by the PS3.

Measured in megaflops, gigabytes and other technical benchmarks, the PlayStation 3 is certainly the world’s most powerful game console. It falls far short, however, of providing the world’s most engaging overall entertainment experience. There is a big difference, and Sony seems to have confused one for the other.

You have to take complaints about the online service -- which has just launched and is free -- with a grain of salt. But the games are another matter. On the tube, G4's X-Play program gives the PS3 launch titles lukewarm to subpar reviews, while the Wii launch titles recieve nearly universal praise.

Sure, I'm a Nintendo loyalist, but I think Nintendo is offering a very different product than either Sony or Microsoft. That said, it seems like the PS3 will have an uphill battle through 2007 if it hopes to beat out the 360 in North America.

Pii.U.

Well, no Wii for this guy.

I'm disappointed, but I can't say that I'm too upset. I know I'll be able to get one eventually. If nothing else, I'm pissed at Sony, Nintendo and the retailers for calling this thing a "launch". If I can't have a reasonable expectation of getting your product without having to get up at 4 am or placing myself in a situation that might get me shot, your product really isn't available, now, is it?

(Go into Target and check out the lovely Wii display, which reminds consumers how Nintendo's new console is THE hot item for Christmas! Then look at the empty display case -- tumbleweed -- and wonder what the fuck they are smoking.)

Footnote: what a stupid, greedy, consumerist bunch Wii are. Even more depressing that I'm a part of it. Can I have my console, now?

The Great Beyond

I had the pleasure of seeing Kid Beyond open up for Imogen Heap last night at the Tabernacle (thanks, Benjy!). You ought to check this guy out. He builds songs, via a sampler, in realtime on stage -- using only his voice. And the guy is like the best beatboxer I have ever seen. Check him out on YouTube, sideways!


As for a gamer connection, Kid Beyond actually performed some of the vocals on Guitar Hero II.

Cartoon Network Korea

Cartoon Network is live in Korea!


From the release:

Launched on November 11, 2006, Cartoon Network is a 24-hour kids' multi-genre entertainment network in Korea which brings together a unique mix of new and recognized programming to Korean kids and their families. Languaged in Korean, the Network provides a diverse mix of quality content drawn from acclaimed production companies from around the world including Japan, Korea and Cartoon Network's own library -- the world's largest cartoon library consisting of more than 14,000 Warner Bros., MGM, Hanna-Barbera and Cartoon Network Originals series and shorts. Cartoon Network is a joint venture between Turner Broadcasting System (TBS) and JoongAng Ilbo (JAI).

Good thing the Koreans like them some MMOs!

PS3 Launch Line-Up

A local Kotaku writer reports about lines for the PS3 at a local Atlanta Best Buy. According to the post, pretty much everyone there is planning to resell their new console on eBay. I love the kid who is going to sell his "to help pay for college" -- you know, they have jobs in book stores for that, dude.

At the very least, this console launch stuff is ridiculous, and at the worst, downright anger-inducing. It's just like those ticket scalpers who buy concert tickets in bulk and then resell them at higher prices to the fans who just want to go see the show at a reasonable price. It crushes my spirit, and it makes me mad. Simple as that. Isn't there a better way to do this?

I like the reader who comments that Sony should just sell the consoles directly on eBay. I'll do one better: fuck eBay. And fuck Best Buy, Toys R Us, EB and all the other asshole retailers, for that matter. Just sell the damn thing on Sony.com. The fulfillment costs can't be that much more than shipping the damn thing worldwide on boats and trucks. But what do I know? Of course, you'd have greedy bastards lining up online, too.

Don't buy a new console for a marked-up price on eBay. Just don't!

Game Journalism Roolz

Kotaku points to an interesting piece in the Escapist about games journalism. More of a roundtable discussion than anything else, it features some of the smartest dudes in the biz. Self-indulgence quotient: remarkably low.

New Spider-Man 3 Trailer

"This could be the end of Spider-Man."

Well, I doubt it!

K-Fed: Okay, Fed

Seriously?


It's awesome that the end of Britney's marriage to K-Fed (who could have predicted that one?) is stealing some of the election news thunder. What a country!

This Federline dude is fascinating. Like all great comic characters, he seems to take himself 100% seriously. What's even more amazing is that the song ("Lose Control") is not horrible. People just want to say it's horrible, because that's what you're supposed to say about a dimwit like K-Fed, but it's really not. I can easily envision an alternate universe in which this song is a chart-topper. It hits every hip-hop cliche right between the eyes.

Poor guy. He's probably up to his gold necklace in debt, and he'll be earning minimum wage by the time Britney gets married again...if he doesn't kill himself first. Another amazing Hollywood punchline.

Jaws Unleashed: Great White Hit!

This breaking news came in earlier today from Majesco:

Edison, N.J., November 7, 2006 – Majesco Entertainment Company (NASDAQ: COOL), an innovative provider of digital entertainment products and content, today announced that retail shipments of JAWS Unleashed have exceeded 500,000 units worldwide since its release on May 23, 2006 for the PlayStation®2 computer entertainment system, Xbox® video game and entertainment system from Microsoft, and PC. In addition, Majesco has also announced a price drop to $19.99 for all three platform skus in North America. The video game is developed through a licensing agreement with Universal Studios Consumer Products Group.

That's pretty fucking unbelievable. But, as my friend Brad explains, the game is "unbelievably awesome!" How apt. Any game with a flying shark gets my vote.

Elmo's Song

Gizmodo reports that some dude turned an Elmo guitar into a working Guitar Hero guitar. Rock!

Guitar Hero II came out today! Did you get your copy?

Free iTunes Downloads

Sure, the iTunes store has some great stuff for purchase, but there's also a lot out there gratis. And I'm not simply referring to the "Let's Talk About My Socks (Explicit)" podcasts! Smart marketers know that nothing says "try my brand" better than F-R-E-E. Of course, Apple would prefer its customers to be of the paying variety, so its really hard to find the free stuff...

Thank you, Mr. Internet! Check out this site for a growing list of free content in the iTunes store, both in the US and internationally. There may be some inaccuracies, but that's the only price you pay for F-R-E-E.

And if you're in a buying mood, maybe purchase the South Park WoW episode! I did!

GameTap Summary

The fun site Gamers With Jobs has an excellent (and accurate) review of GameTap for your reading pleasure. Here's the soundbite: "Like everything else about Gametap, it's horribly marketed on its own merits, but in and of itself it's brilliant." Word!

Thanks to Gideon for the head's up.

MMO Economics

Real-world economics are important to consider when developing an MMO. Just ask my boss, Sam Lewis, who was recently featured on a Marketplace report about virtual economies.

Did you know that Second Life generates as much as $2M per month in transactions? The Second Life economy could eat some African economies for breakfast. (Ironic, since most people in Africa don't ever get to eat breakfast.) Seriously, this is a little bit disturing. But also very cool, in a William Gibson kind of way...

Justice League Heroes Podcast

A video iPod is your ticket to a whole new world of branded promotional entertainment! Check out the three-part Justice League Heroes video podcast in the iTunes store, free to download and providing a prologue story to the video game of the same name.

On a side note, people want to hate this game -- mostly because DC-branded games have historically been shovelware. But check it: I played the game at E3, and it was one of the biggest (pleasant) surprises of the show. I'll be sure to pick it up eventually.

Hats Off to the Hardcore

Wii are disappointed.

Went yesterday to Toys R Us before they opened to try and pre-order a Wii and a PS3. When I got there, about 1.5 hours prior to opening, I found lots of folks hanging out by the side entrance. (And by "folks," I mean, "nerds.") In any event, some of them had been there since the night before, and one of them cheerfully* pointed out to me that all the consoles were already spoken for. Apparently, each Toys R Us received 10 Wii pre-orders and 6 PS3 pre-orders. Gee, that should satisfy demand!

Anyway, the last guy in line graciously** explained that he had gotten there at 7:30 am, so anyone arriving after him was SOL. ORLY? As far as I know, there is not a law stating that "nerdiest nerds get first dibs" -- but I was willing to concede.

In all seroiusness, props to the gamers who are so dedicated that they will sleep in a Toys R Us parking lot to obtain a new console. I, on the other hand, have better things to do with my life. And I refuse to play these stupid games in order to play my stupid games.

I will be interested to read the blogs this morning to see others' reactions. Kotaku has a nice summary here.

*vindictively

**rudely

Another One Bites the iDust

Well, I have discovered a veritable "iPod killer" -- ME! My iPod abruptly stopped working the other night. (Dropping it earlier in the evening might have had something to do with it.) Anyway, this iPod was a replacement for the earlier one that I broke back in February. Poop!

So I brought it into Apple, and confirmed what I already knew: replacement iPods only have a 90-day warrantee. They recommended sending it for a diagnosis from a trusted third-party vendor, so I used the excellent iPodResQ service. For $29, they shipped me a protective box and an overnight DHL label, which I used to ship the unit back to them. In less than 24 hours, they called me back with a diagnosis: FUBAR. Well, not exactly, but the digital guts of the unit are all screwed up and the battery needs to be replaced. Total: $149. Yipe!

Fortunately, the hard drive was fine, and iPodResQ offered to buy it for $60. Not bad at all. I guess I'll just use that towards my new video iPod!

(Gosh, I hope I have a more gentle touch with this one.)

Footnote: if your iPod breaks, and you bring it in to Apple, they will let you trade it in for 10% off a new one.

I "Saw" it on YouTube

It is exactly this kind of stuff that makes YouTube an extremely compelling promotional tool for entertainment companies:


Note that this isn't merely a trailer for "Saw III" -- it's a trailer for "Saw III" produced specifically for YouTube. Granted, the production value is low, but it proves a point: media companies are taking YouTube seriously. Mazal tov, Google!

But seriously, will YouTube ever be more than a destination for pratfall videos and old Letterman episodes? Only time will tell. Even the "big hits" on YouTube are nothing compared to, say, LOST.

For a really interesting take on the subject, see this recent New Yorker article.

Pelican 1, Pigeon 0

Blimey! Over in the UK, pelicans are mad crazy! Check it. Maybe they need to import some of them to New York, you know, to keep the natives in line...

Sock = Rock!

Thanks to a recent post on GameSetWatch, an awesome rock band called Uncle Monsterface has come to my attention. Why I never heard of these guys before, I don't know. They are a sock puppet rock band! (And they live right up my alley.)


In any event, they are releasing some kind of Nintendo-themed album to coincide with the release of the Wii. Nerds! I'd rather hear their version of 2112, frankly.

North Korean Crisis

Mark Bazer, a preeminent Asian scholar* and close personal friend, has written a very insightful piece about the current state of affairs in North Korea.

*not a preeminent Asian scholar

Me in Reverse

If you're like me, the last transcendent rock album you've heard might have been 1999's "The Soft Bulletin" by the Flaming Lips. By "transcendent" I mean: there was a time before you ever heard the album, and a time after you heard the album, with the actual first listening of the album demarcating a very special musical experience.


Well, if you're a rock fan in search of another amazing recording, look no further than Built to Spill's latest, "You in Reverse". I've always liked this band, but never loved them, per se. However, upon hearing this album I was immediately enchanted. (This is actually a bit different from my experience with "Soft Bulletin", which took some time to really grow on me.) It's truly amazing.

I know I'm a little late on this, as the album came out over six months ago. But I'm not as young as I used to be. Anyway, it's easily one of my favorite purchases of the year, and -- like "Soft Bulletin" -- likely to be one of my favorites for a long time to come.

Get it!

Konichiwa!

Well, I finally posted my pictures from Japan.


There's a lot to see. Start here.


I also posted my pictures from the Tokyo Game Show, which you can view here. Enjoy!

Robot 1, Rubik's Cube 0

Seconds after filming was finished, RuBot II incinerated the child and declared, "humanity is obsolete". Fair warning!

White and Nerdy

When my wife says that Weird Al is "brilliant" you know for a fact that he must be doing something right. This is hilarious.

CN Video

Hey, have you checked out Cartoon Network Video?

Animal House

I tell ya, I was relieved to see some of my feelings about the current state of feature animation echoed in a recent article by Mike Hernandez of the NYT. Basically: too many movies with animals in them. Also: many of them suck. From the article:

The main criticism of animated movies within the industry and among consumers is that they are beginning to look alike. And the recent crop looks a lot like a zoo. Natalie Ward, 13, who was out shopping with her grandmother, Bonnie Ward, in Hollywood recently, was unimpressed with the latest offerings. “There are so many movies with animals,” she said, pursing lips tinged blue by the icy neon drink in her hand. “The ones about cows are too, like, I don’t know — boring.”

Ica Age was great. But how about Shark Tale? What a steaming pile of chum! And let's not forget Madagascar, The Wild, Open Season, Barnyard, etc. I watched Over the Hedge on a plane recently, and it was pure trash. What is it with these wisecrackin', namecallin', smartypants cartoon characters? Bugs Bunny wore it well, but these guys just make me want to turn them into roadkill. And this was a movie that got some decent notices! Well, there's more on the way, with two movies about rats and another one about penguins. Can't wait.

Fact is, animated features have often and historically featured animals in their lead roles. Just think about The Rescuers, The Aristocats, Lady and the Tramp, and on and on and on. It's not that animals are bad....it's the movies that are!

I'm Surrounded by Assholes

Even though I would like to think otherwise, I have a sneaking suspicion that the new Spaceballs animated series is going to be terrible. (Not to mention about 15 years too late.)

Seriously, G4? What are you guys smoking over there?

Gaming Life in Seoul

This recent NYT article nicely captures the current gaming culture in Korea. The author may suffer from some hyperbole, but I was actually at the Coex during a taping, and it was as described in the article. Madness!

Seoul Power

I posted my pictures from Seoul!


Check them out here.

My First YouTube Video

Aw, isn't he cute?

Make Love, Not Warcraft

Just hilarious.

Wii Preorder Update

When can Wii preorder a Wii? Well, according to one local EB that I called in the Atlanta area, presales are scheduled for October 17. However, another local store that I queried said that they had "no plans announced" for preorders. Hmmm. Gamers, start your wallets.

More WoW for the Masses

The mainstream press continues to ride the World of Warcraft bandwagon. This piece ran in Newsweek right before I left for Korea. And, yes, the game seems to be a big hit in Seoul as well. Maybe I shouldn't have just uninstalled WoW from my computer?

The Bunnies Are Back

And this time, it's The Ring.

Gay TGS Coverage

My first post for GayGamer.net is now available for your viewing pleasure!

Goodbye Seoul, Hello Tokyo

Greetings from Tokyo! It's always been a dream of mine to visit Japan, and now it's happening for realz. But before we forget about Seoul, I want to share my favorite photo from the trip:


This picture was taken during the changing of the guard at Gyeongbokgung Palace in the old part of Seoul. I took tons of photos and will share them when I get home!

Tomorrow I will be at the Tokyo Game Show, Japan's biggest video game extravaganza! It should be quite amazing. In honor of this event, I will post one more awesome photo from a Korean arcade:


Yes, that is "Poka Poka Satan" -- a devil-themed whack-a-mole game.

Make sure you tune in for my coverage of TGS over at GayGamer.net. I may not be gay, but I play one on the web.

Rogue Galaxy

In case you missed it, Rogue Galaxy is scheduled to hit the States on October 5! This awesome-looking Japanese RPG is brought to us by Level 5, the same folks who gave us the positively divine Dragon Quest VIII. Normally I can't hang with this genre, but a unique setting, sweet overall design, cool characters and seemingly action-packed combat system has me excited. Check out the trailer on the official Japanese site to see for yourself.

On a side note: with only a few short months to the PS3 launch, the PS2 still has a lot going for it. Yakuza, Rogue Galaxy, Okami...these are some seriously good-looking and relatively high-profile titles. Seriously, I'm more excited for Okami than anything supposedly launching with the PS3. Rhetorical question: has a new console ever been bested by its immediate predecessor?

Seoul Brother No. 1

Well, here I am in Seoul! It's already been an eye-opening experience. First off, the city is much more Westernized than I expected. Certainly Seoul is a huge international city, but its ascent into the digital stratosphere (largest broadband penetration in the world) seems to have come with the consumerist tendencies of the West: gigantic shopping malls, SUVs, digital phones for everyone over the age of five, high gas prices, etc. Yesterday afternoon (Saturday) included visits to two huge shopping centers, which were jam-packed with people buying everything from clothes and toys to Starbucks coffee and green tea ice cream. Sure, there are visual reminders of the Asian culture: civic buildings shaped like old palaces, traditional colorful Korean fabrics in the shops, and the smell of kimchi everywhere. (Like, EVERYWHERE.) Speaking of, the food here is really cheap and REALLY good.

As for the negative, the traffic here is bad. Horrible. Worst I've ever seen. It took me two hours to get to my hotel from the airport in Friday afternoon rush hour traffic. I've since heard a statistic that there are 15 MILLION cars in this city. It makes any jaunt across the Han river a huge pain in the ass. There are so many cars, you can't even cross most of the big avenues at street level -- you must go underground or find another way. That all being said, the subways are super clean. In fact, all public areas of the city are spotless. They employ people to wipe down the handrails in the train station!

Some other quirks include: heated toilet seats, awesome video arcades, and a chain of French juice bars called "Le Crapeau" (Hee, hee!). Also, barber shop poles indicate where you can get a trim...and some trim! (Shave and a haircut with a happy ending.)

My hotel is dope. There is a bathroom shower room (not a stall, a ROOM) with a "rain" device installed in the ceiling. Also a high-pressure wand, which I turned on by accident this morning and nearly flooded the closet. Everything is my room is controlled by touch panels on the wall: lights, curtains, etc. One wall is floor-to-ceiling glass, with an impeccable view. Turner knows how to spoil us rotten, that's for damn sure.

I've already taken some nice pictures but I'm doing some more touring today. Hopefully I will be able to upload them soon. I'm feeling lazy and jet lagged. More soon!

Austin Game Conference Recap

I really enjoyed the Austin Game Conference, even though I came down with a nasty 24-hour bug before I even got to the hotel. No biggie. The conference is attended by roughly 2,000 game developers, writers, programmers, yadda yadda...making for what is truly an "intimate" gathering by normal conference standards. I met a lot of cool people and actually had some room to breathe between sessions. Spent most of my time at the Writer's Conference panels, which were overall very rewarding. Mostly, these sessions served to remind me how many people are currently making a living doing this writing thing. Of course, some of us are "designers" and some of us are "content managers" and so on, but we're all writers. This kind of blurring of roles is probably pretty common in a young industry like the games biz. No one seemed to have the exact same job description as the next guy, and surely everyone's individual career path was unique. This certainly seemed the case based on the conversations I had.

In any event, it is heartening to know that the writing aspect of game development seems to be blooming. Spearheading this movement are really cool companies like BioWare and UbiSoft. Regarding BioWare, some of the guys doing Mass Effect were on hand to give a presentation about digital actors and their highly-touted conversation engine -- Gamasutra did a decent recap here. More importantly, BioWare clearly stresses story as the foundation of a good game (they said as much), backing up their claim by employing over 20 staff writers between their Edmonton and Austin locations. As for UbiSoft, their senior editorial dude gave a very low-key presentation about managing 15-20 games in simultaneous development. As a company that is clearly focused on a high level of production value, it was cool to know that they also require top-notch writing (while still churning out a ton of really high-quality titles).

A panel on writing comedy for games was interesting, but mostly because the speakers were obviously very smart and talented (and funny). The same could be said of the "Inside the Voice Actor's Studio" panelists, but unfortunately, they seemed more concerned with telling witty celebrity anecdotes than providing useful info. Oh, well! Interestingly, one of the best sessions came at the end of the conference, which took the form of a roundtable discussion instead of a panel. (Many of the previous speakers were still around and joined in.) With a more laid-back and conversational tone, this session nicely reinforced my feeling that game writers are now part of a lively and growing -- if not exactly thriving -- field.

In other news, Austin is a really cool town. They have awesome barbecue, and lots of bats live there.

Rocket Slime!

Oh, yes...I will be buying this as soon as I get back from Asia. (Unless I can't stand the wait and buy the Japanese version in Tokyo!)

Guitar Hero II Track List

Hey, so while I wasn't paying attention, someone revealed the Guitar Hero II track list. Highlights include "Madhouse" by Anthrax, "Sweet Child O' Mine" by G'n'R and (surprise!) Spinal Tap's "Tonight I'm Gonna Rock You Tonight". There's barely 30 tracks on the list, and I seem to remember something about over 40 being available in the game, so here's hoping that "The Trooper" is an unlockable. Maiden!

Thanks to Chrissie for the link.

Hollywood Reports on Game Writing

A really excellent article about game writing can be found here, on the Hollywood Reporter's website. The showbiz trade publications are devoting more and more attention to games, it seems, and this is a good piece to time with the Austin Game Conference. I had no idea that the writer's conference was only in its second year!

NYT on WoW

Joystiq reports on an article in today's New York Times about World of Warcraft. This comes just a few weeks after a piece in the Washington Post about MMOs. While the Post piece is typically alarmist, stressing the clinically "addictive" nature of MMOs -- even stating that "many game companies employ psychologists" to make the games even more so. Okaaay. Meanwhile, the Times takes a calmer approach, albeit with the familiar "Hey, did you know games are popular all over the world and make lots of money?" angle we see so often in the mainstream press. Well, at least there is some positive coverage to be had. I liked this quote from Microsoft's Rich Wickham: “World of Warcraft is an incredibly polished entertainment experience that appeals to more sorts of different players than any game I’ve seen.” Very true.

Crazy Cartoon Character Skeletons

These awesome skeletal recreations of famous cartoon characters are going to be exhibiting at a gallery in Seoul when I am there later this month. Sweet!


They immediately reminded me of the anatomical sketches of Portland artist Michael Paulus.

Austin Game Conference

Next week, I will be attending the Game Writers Conference in Austin, TX. I was just putting my schedule together, and I am really excited! With sessions like "Narrative Design" and "Writing Comedy for Games" the experience should be very interesting. Some pretty good talent will be there, including folks who worked on God of War, Psychonauts and Jade Empire -- just some of the best-written games of the last few years. The downside is a lack of sessions devoted to MMO writing, although a guy who worked on Neverwinter Nights 2 is giving a talk entitled, "How to Write the Best Game. Ever."

MMO, Boy!

Say what you want about LOtR Online, that shit looks gorgeous.


Check out the image gallery at IGN.

PS3 Website Up

Sony has launched the official Japanese PS3 site. Hooray?

Speaking of Sony, Joystiq plugged a Wired article about Sony yesterday. I read the piece last night, and while it does come across pretty evenhanded, I find it hard to believe that Sony would actually "bet it all" on a $600 entertainment device. Although the writer is probably correct in his assumption that Sony is no longer thinking about the customer. I mean, I can't imagine that there are enough gamers out there (much less mainstream folk) willing to pony up that kind of dough to substantiate the price tag. I guess we'll see...

PS3 launches in Japan on 11/11.

Arrested Development on G4

Somehow this bit of news slipped through the cracks: starting Monday, G4 is putting Arrested Development back on the air, four (or is it five?) days a week. This decision speaks to the channel's apparent schizophrenia, although at least they are picking good shows. But in all seriousness, who do they think is watching? Based on their programming line-up and branding, it is impossible to tell.

lolz n00b!

Speaking of posting, this is a funny bit about posting on the Steam forums, something which I just came across this morning. I'm sure it's really old. But since I find visitng public message boards to be the online equivalent of wading chest-deep into raw sewage, I thought it was pretty clever. Post at your own discretion.

Blogger Woes...Blogger Blows?

I set up this site on our Jilly server over a year ago with no problems, and have been enjoying the futuristic fun of blogging -- not only a great, "low impact" creative outletm, but also nice way to keep track of fun things on the internets. In general, Blogger has been easy to use and, when I had a few hiccups with archiving, their customer service was excellent. However, I've noticed a definite trend in the last few months: 404 errors when I try to pull up the Blogger home page, bizarre login errors, lots of postus interruptus and poor Blogger server response in general. WTF? Well, according to Wired, this has been going on for a while (interesting that linked article was written right around the time I started this blog). Wired also does a feature this month about the proliferation of splogs, or spam blogs. God, I hate those fucking things. I wonder if that's what's ruining it for the rest of us?

Gee, I hope this post works.

Nobody Beats the Wiz

Aw, yeah! I can't believe I forgot that the Wizard hit DVD last week. I guess I was too busy watching the totally awesome "Who Wants to Be a Superhero?" on Sci-Fi, another guilty pleasure.

Segregated Survivor Roolz

Am I the only one who thinks that some people are making a big deal out of a whole lot of nothing? I can't wait for the new season of Survivor, just like I couldn't wait for last year's. Burnett keeps topping himself, and those who think that this is just a "ratings stunt" forget that the show has been a success for nearly its entire run on CBS.

Next year, I look forward to the Jews versus the Goyim.

YouTube Generation

What compels the newest generation of youngsters to post videos like the one below? I mean, it is really quite charming until you realize that they posted it on purpose.


Then again, back in the day, me and my friends made a video of our lip synch to Pete Townsend's "Face the Face" -- and I was playing lead tennis racket. We probably thought it was the coolest thing ever and would have posted it to YouTube, had it existed. So go fig.

The Headlines Write Themselves

Box Office Mojo has a nice recap of the somewhat disappointing performance of Sankes on a Plane. I say "somewhat" because the movie did pretty okay, despite not living up to the massive amount of fanboy hysteria on the web. Talk about box office poison! Yuk yuk yuk yuk.

Quiet, You!

This picture cracks me up:

Vintage Rock Posters

Hot damn. Here's a pretty cool site that I stumbled across today: Wolfgang's Vault.


You could spend hours looking at all the vintage posters these guys are selling. Granted, most of them seem to be from the west coast, and some of them are REALLY pricey...but if you have a favorite band (and who doesn't?) you're sure to find something here to tickle your fancy. And your wallet!

Dog Police

Old timers will remember these nutjobs as the winners of MTV's first "Basement Tapes" contest. You can't put a price tag on this kind of genius.


Holy crap, was that really 1980?

Oogloo and Anju

Seth of 8 Bit Weapon just brought this to my attention: a series of Cartoon Network shorts called Oogloo + Anju that features chip music in its soundtrack. Pretty cool, and the shorts are awesome! You can watch them all on the site, or tune in to Sunday Pants on CN (if it is still on).

Geek Moment

Speaking of my favorite movies ever, I just got finished watching Flash Gordon (1980). Towards the end of the movie, during the climactic battle, some music started playing that seemed weirdly familiar (and not just because I've seen the movie dozens of times). It was bothering me, until I remembered that I was hearing music from a video game...but what game? Ah, yes, it's Vanguard! A great coin-op game and one of my favorite Atari 2600 ports. I just played it in Stella right now to be sure, and yep, same music.

Well, turns out the movie didn't borrow from the game, the game "borrowed" from the movie! (Vanguard came out in 1981.) I don't know how a Japanese videogame manufacturer decided to lift random instrumental Queen music from an over-the-top sci-fi romp starring a former football player, the chick from Manimal and a guy named after the smoker's tooth polish...but there you go. And I confirmed it in Wikipedia, so it has to be true!

Holy Crap

Yes, folks. Warner Bros. is remaking my favorite film of all time. I'm beside myself with terrified excitement!

Chad Vader

This is very funny.


More info can be found here. Thanks to Molly for the head's up!

Bob Marley Cell Phone Game

The makers of Bomberman and Bonk's Adventure finally bring us the cell phone game we've all been waiting for. From the official site: "Hey Mon! Enjoy the tropics as you play as Bob Marley in some fun mini games. This game celebrates Marley's passions, from island life, soccer, and of course, music - Reggae style!" No mention of the "pass the dutchie" mini-game. Someone please explain this screenshot:


Obviously, this is the "steer the soccer ball meteor with the power of Jah" mini-game. What's that sound you hear? Why, the sound of Bob Marley spinning in his grave, of course!

Thanks to Kotaku for the link.

RIP Phantom

How can you kill something...that is ALREADY DEAD? Finally living up to its namesake, the Phantom console seems to be kaputski once and for all.

Rabbitts of the Lost Ark

I don't care if you think they sold out, the 30-second bunnies are still freaking funny.

Cartoon Network MMO

From the Associated Press, a new article which can be found here and elsewhere.

YouTube for Games?

Yes...that's what Microsoft says. I predict 1,000 different versions of Joanna Dark nude mods, but I'm a skeptic. (Who knows...maybe this will breed the next Counterstrike for consoles.)

Thanks to Eric for link.

Hate + Love = Fun!

Here is a great blogpost in which the writer muses about his love/hate relationship with WoW. Frankly, it makes extracting oneself from Warcraft sound a lot like quitting smoking. (Something I am all too familiar with, unfortunately.) Dude, can I bum a gold?

Finally!

According to USA Today, Pac-Man is going digital. All I can say is: about fucking time. Remember when we had to play Pac-Man with nothing but beads, a couple of sponges and a tennis ball? That sucked!

Ribbit

Microsoft is really crowing (croaking?) about Frogger on Xbox Live Arcade. (Did you know it was also on GameTap? Bet you didn't!) Anyway, peep IGN's "review" of Frogger, and don't miss the top five upcoming games in the genre:

1. Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell Double Agent (X360)
2. Assassin's Creed (PS3)
3. Lost Planet (X360)
4. Dirge of Cerberus: Final Fantasy VII (PS2)
5. N3: Ninety-Nine Nights (X360)

I love that part in Splinter Cell when Sam Fisher puts Lambert on his back and ferries him across the Seine to escape the Chinese Mafia and a bunch of snapping turtles!

I <3 Murder Simulation

I'm probably totally outside scooping this, but anyway...you may remember Jack Thompson's "Modest Video Game Proposal" -- a ham-fisted attempt at satire in which the notorious anti-game lawyer described (basically) the most violent video game ever. He then went on to challenge game developers to make the game, and promised to give some money to charity if any accepted the challenge. Bah blah blah...if you need a refresher, read it here.

Anyway, earlier this year, someone made the game...


Ha! Ready? It's great fun! Features include "seven unique weapons, a Realistic Urine Engine and an ending that is almost 15 seconds long!" (From the official site.)

The game is surprisingly polished, and actually reminds me quite a bit of Dad 'n Me, a hytserically violent River City-esque romp from the guys who made Alien Hominid.

And check it: if you don't want to bother with the game, watch a playthrough on Google Video! What a world.

New Audioslave

Audioslave's new album, Revelations, comes out in less than a month. Didn't they just put out a record? Man, time flies when you're not waiting for new Audioslave albums! Anyhoo, I listened to the single -- entitled "Original Fire" -- on their official site. It's good, but a little wanky. Definitely not the awesomeness of "Your Time Has Come" (seen here) but I remain hopeful! Don't let me down, gentlemen. Make with the rock.

Wii Launch Titles from Ubisoft

Just got back from vacation and I'm catching up on all my emails...one came in from Ubisoft while I was gone, announcing their seven confirmed launch titles for the Wii:

Blazing Angels®: Squadrons of WW II: As a squadron leader and ace fighter pilot, leverage the Wii controller to experience intense dog fighting in the famous air battles of WW II. Air combat simulation, rating pending.

Far Cry®: As Jack Carver, use the Wii Remote to drive, shoot, slash, jump and climb your way through a rebel-infested tropical hell. First-person action shooter, rating pending.

GT Pro Series: Immerse yourself in the fast-paced action of this exclusive Wii car-racing game and take full advantage of the Wii Remote. Racing game, rating pending.

Open Season™: Allows gamers to relive the humor and adventure of Sony Pictures Animation’s highly anticipated, first feature-length CG animated film. Kids adventure, rating pending.

Monster 4X4 World Circuit: Use the Wii Remote to perform spectacular stunts, jump and race the most powerful Monster Trucks, and go head-to-head in pulse-pounding off-road competitions all over the world. Truck racing, rating pending.

Rayman Raving Rabbids™: Experience the return of Rayman when his world is threatened by a devastating invasion of crazed, out-of-control bunnies. Whether it be crazy Kung-Fu action or competing in the cow toss, players will use the Wii Remote in the most imaginative and innovative ways possible to defeat these whacky rabbids. Action-adventure, rating pending.

Red Steel™: This Wii exclusive title takes place in modern-day Japan and challenges players to master both the ancient art of the katana and the sophisticated technology of modern firearms. First-person action, rating pending.

Red Steel is the only thing I can really get really excited about, although Rayman could be a blast since Michel Ancel is once again involved in the series.

God, how many more versions of Far Cry will we have to suffer through?

Stupidity: Still an International Problem

Suing game companies as a result of personal tragedy is not just for Americans, anymore! In this story from a few months ago, some parents in China sued the Asian distributor of WoW after their son fatally jumped off a roof. (Yes, it's horrible. I won't bother with the rant.) Interestingly, I did not see this story pop up on any game blogs...I wonder how the issue resolved.

So, anyone heading to China Joy this week?

Google Trends

Aren't you tired of hearing about what an awesome, amazing and super company Google is? Me, neither! Check out Google Trends, something I stumbled across this morning totally on my own, without any help from a magazine or a blog or forwarded email or anything! From the site: "Google Trends aims to provide insights into broad search patterns. As a Google Labs product, it is still in the early stages of development. Also, it is based upon just a portion of our searches, and several approximations are used when computing your results. Please keep this in mind when using it." Translation: it's in Beta.

Still, very interesting! And kind of similar to another cool hidden gem: the Google Zeitgeist. I can't wait until Google can spot trends in my bowel movements.

Lady in Hot Water

Wow. Apparently, M. Night Shyamalan's latest film is a real turd. Swing away, critics!

Official Announcement

Cartoon Network is developing an MMO? Do tell!

Retro A-Go-Go

I heard about these weird retro-styled GBA games coming out in Japan, and GSW was kind enough to point us to Nintendo's official site, which is now live. Not as cool as the Classic NES series site, but still pretty neat, with TV ads and other stuff to find. Next, check out Taito's Space Invaders 25th anniversary site, which has an awesome little Flash widget on the home page. (In fact, all the content here puts Konami's Frogger site to shame.) Speaking of Space Invaders, you MUST check this out!

Awesome SpyHunter Movie Gets Awesome SpyHunter Game

Meta alert: video game based on movie that is based on a video game is coming your way. (The snake has eaten its tail!)

Midway presents part one of this absolutely mind-bending interview with Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, in which he discusses how awesome his awesome movie-based-on-a-video-game video game is going to rock with awesomeness.

Plus, his character is going to BE ABLE TO GET OUT OF HIS CAR, which is so awesome that I might not be able to stop my boner from shattering my pants. Get ready...


Midway Gets Candid With Dwayne "THE ROCK" Johnson
– Part 1 –
THE ROCK talks about his role in Spy Hunter: Nowhere to Run and Knight Rider.

Were you a fan of the original SpyHunter?

I was a big fan of the original game. When Midway came to me with the idea, of course, we were still in the development of the movie. So my first question was how is this game going to be different? How can it compete? They said for the first time the fans of the video game Spy Hunter are going to be able to get out of the car and actually become this character who's been driving this car all this time.

So I thought, okay, how else can we compete because the video game market is so ultra competitive? How can we be creative? How can we maim and bring death to the opponents creatively with my bare hands? :)

Since your character gets out of the car for the first time in franchise history, do you think this makes SpyHunter the next Knight Rider?

Okay, well let me tell you something. Comparing Michael Knight to Alex Decker is like comparing wine to vinegar. Alex doesn't care about wearing the coolest jeans or the coolest jacket. He just has one mission, which is to hunt down spies and to kick ass like there's no tomorrow.

Are there any wrestling moves we'll recognize in the game?

Oh definitely. There's a couple of signature moves in there. For example, the rock bottom was a big finishing move for me, signature move. So we included that. There are different versions of suplexes and things that I learned from a lot of Japanese wrestlers, that if they're performed the way they're supposed to be performed, they're highly, highly dangerous. So then I just took it to another level. It's just crazy the stuff we were coming up with. And it was awesome. I saw it all back and I couldn't be happier. It was great.


Fascinating.

Wait a minute, did the Rock just dis my man Michael Knight back there? Like, wanting to wear the coolest jacket AND kicking ass like there's no tomorrow are mutually exclusive? Listen, Mr. Johnson, just because YOU can't walk and chew gum at the same time doesn't mean you have to get all up in Michael Knight's face about it. Frankly, I think Michael Knight would be happy to rip Alex Decker's pussy off and wear it like a kimono. Show THAT move to your Japanese wrestling friends, bucko!

(Dude, seriously? I actually kinda liked Doom, so get with the friggin' program!)

Adrian!

Sure, everyone's going to tell you that Rocky Balboa is going to suck, but mark my words: this movie will KICK ASS. Sylvester Stallone, the most unfairly maligned star of our era.

(We'll just try to forget all about Rhinestone and Stop or My Mom Will Shoot and Oscar and Daylight and...)

OK, You Win

Hey toy collectors, next time someone tells you that you have too many useless treasures, simply point them to the guy who has 15,000 Mario plushies. Thanks to GSW for the link.

Toonami Jetstream

The launch of Toonami Jetstream is just a few days away, and what I've seen so far has been really impressive. (Nice work, guys!) Jetstream is the natural evolution of a somewhat similar project that I worked on many years ago, called Toonami Reactor. (I guess we were just ahead of our time.) Although "Jetstream" is a much better name...

Things I Hate

I am starting a list of things that I hate. Here are the first ten.

1. Hangers
2. Dogs that sing
3. Stickers on produce
4. Car seats
5. Psoriasis
6. Clap-alongs
7. BMWs
8. Celtic music
9. Boss fights
10. Bob Marley: Legend

These Are Not Fluffy Bunnies

Jetix Europe is debuting a new show called Yin Yang Yo on the web next week. I checked it out, and it looks pretty cool! The villain is a cockroach wizard, which is totally awesome. From the people who brought you the Fairly OddParents. Coming to the US in the fall. This post brought to you by the Walt Disney Co. and your favorite, most deliciousest sugar cereal.

Toys for (Rich) Nerds

Peep my pics from Rotofugi, the awesome hipster toy emporium in Chicago! (Visit them on the web here.)


Is pink Astronaut Jesus my favorite? Don't know, but he sure is awesome...and he died for our sins!

Spider-Man 3

The new Spider-Man 3 trailer is live on Sony's site. Let's just say that it ain't only my spider sense that's tingling...wow!

Pinch a Brick

As a Blackberry user, I've often wondered if there is any kind of subcult devoted to "BrickBreaker" -- you know, the Breakout clone that comes installed on your BB for free. I'm not particularly good at the game (let's face it, some of the design is broken), but when I met a female executive in the Delta lounge a few years ago who had "beat" the game, I became determined to do the same. Well, no luck so far.

In any case, I googled "BrickBreaker" this morning and discovered something hilarious: according to the urban dictionary, the phrase "playing BrickBreaker" is a euphemism for taking a shit!

(You know you've done it, too.)

My Xbox Cup Runneth Over

And you thought gamers weren't athletic? This just in from the world of fake soccer:

(Note generous use of word "thrilling" in headline.)

PORTUGAL LIFT THE XBOX CUP IN BERLIN

THE XBOX CUP TOURNAMENT COMES TO A THRILLING CONCLUSION

Berlin, July 1, 2006 – Portugal was crowned the Xbox Cup Champions having won the tournament on EA’s 2006 FIFA World Cup™ on the Xbox® 360 console. In a rousing ceremony, the team lifted the Xbox Cup trophy to rounds of applause from the 8500 seater adidas stadium, at the centre of the Platz der Republik, Berlin, where the Xbox Cup’s action took place. Peter Moore, Corporate Vice President, Microsoft was there to present the trophy and be the first to offer his congratulations to the triumphant team.

The team beat Mexico 2 - 1 in the gripping final to secure their places in football gaming history. In the first semi-final, host nation Germany went up against Mexico, they were dominant throughout the first half of the game and translated that into a goal early into the second half. However, the Mexicans fought back aggressively and won through in extra time with a final score of 2 – 1. The second semi-final saw neighbors Portugal and Spain going head-to-head with the Portuguese 2 – 0 up by halftime. Though the Spaniards came back valiantly in the second half, the final score read 3 - 2 to Portugal. When it came to the Grand Final, gaming foreshadowed reality, with the Portuguese emerging victorious just hours before their World Cup counterparts did the same in their quarter final match.

The Portuguese team is made up of Miguel Angelo Dinis, 28, and Antonio Luis Ferreira Gomes, 21. Joao Miguel Gouveia da Cruz Dias, 24, accompanied them as their ultimate fan.

Matt, Matt, Matt

A writer named Matt Hawkins has written an incredibly comprehensive piece about gaming in New York for GameSetWatch. Definitely worth a read if you live in NYC! (I was sad to hear that Lazer Park is dead, but so it goes.) Meanwhile, Matt Sakey gets all up in your shizzle about game writing in his latest column for the IGDA. Finally, this Matt is "working" from home today...did everyone see the latest Marvel Ultimate Alliance trailer? Black Bolt!!

Music for Nerds, Vol. 1337

Simon over at GameSetWatch has posted a number of cool music-related things in the last week or so. First was the four-disc nerdcore compilation, which contains a whopping 80+ tracks of hit-and-miss geek rap. With subjects ranging from World of Warcraft to Emma Frost's hard outer shell, there's bound to be something here to tickle your fanboy bone. Next is the extremely nerdy Cave Story remix project. This is remixed music from the soundtrack of a homebrew sidescrolling freeware PC game from a Japanese developer. That's so hardcore, it's like adamantium-mixed-with-vibranium hardcore.

By the way, all this music is made available for free by the artists, so there's no reason not to check it out. And if you haven't played Cave Story (also free), then you really need to. The game has been making waves in the game community for its quirky style and high level of polish. Seriously, it's awesome. R2 called it "one of the best platformers I've ever played." Again, no excuses!

Wherever Particular People Congregate

Yes, the old Pall Mall cigarette slogan is highly appropriate for the salon of the future: MySpace! If you've been reading the news lately (or watching pedophile sting operations on Dateline), you've probably started to think that online communities are a sordid cesspool of sex and other deviant activities. Not so! Why, just the other day, I received this message in my MySpace inbox:

"Hey Matthew!

I don't mean to bother you.. I just moved out here around Atlanta for work a couple of weeks ago. It sucks cuz I don't know AnYBoDY out here ;(. My friends back home suggested I start a myspace and look for people in my area. I just started today so here I am! :D

Well I'm lookin to meet a guy and you are pretty cute Hehe. About me... Well I'm 24, single, and I love to have fun. I'm into older men. Since you're cute and 33, you fit the profile! LoL

I just started this myspace stuff today so my profile is pretty thin to say the least. If you wanna see some of my pix, I have a homepage @ houseofvicky.com/kris - there's a bunch of photos and stuff... I also left you a PeRSoNaL message on the front page so come check it out k?

XoXo KriSty"

What an enterprising young lass! With her clever use of online lingo, not to mention her tenuous grasp of punctuation and capitalization rules, I knew "KriSty" was legit. I responded immediately, and we met this morning for a coffee at a little after 7 am. Early? Yes. But, like, she just started her job, you know, and is trying to make a good impression by showing up on time. Anyway, KriSty is a fine looking young woman, to be sure. She was eager to learn about the Atlanta environs and wanted to know what I did to "kill time". Being a married man, this seemed to be a bit of an inappropriate question, especially the way she twirled her hair and pushed out her pert young breasts when she asked me. So I sort of dodged the question and suggested visiting the aquarium.

Anyway, if that doesn't prove that online communities like MySpace are excellent social networking tools and vital outlets for today's young people, I don't know what does. Long live the web!

P.S. Give KriSty a call; she gives awesome head.

Daily Show: Congressional Video Game Hearings

Thanks to Chrissie for the link!

Massively Multiplayer Academia

Are videogames worthy of academic study? Sure they are! Here are some people from Trinity University who prove the point. (Although academics who still insist on hyphenating "on-line" deserve some skepticism.) With papers such as "MMOs as therapy: A therapeutic tool or barrier to psychological growth" and "Aesthetics and gratification: Sexual practices in virtual environments" you have to give props to the depths to which these scholars were willing to sink in order to shed light on these complex issues. Humankind will undoubtedly benefit from their collective efforts.


(Okay, so maybe you detect a little sarcasm here. In all seriousness, it's nice to see the academic community turning to games as a subject worthy of study, although I don't think a paper entitled "Violence in MMOs: It's not only adolescent boys who like this stuff" is really tackling the tough issues.)

Thanks to Kotaku for posting this!

Happy Birthday, Sonic

Sonic the Hedgehog turns 15 this year (wow), and that means SEGA's favorite mascot is probably gonna try pot for the first time, listen to annoying rap-metal and act all surly around the grown-ups. It also means that GameTap is celebrating with some interesting new additions to its library.

Bright Red Nonsense

Here is an amusing local news story about Cartoon Network's latest outdoor ad campaign.

Toy Discount

Since the three people who read my blog might care about this, check out Toyzz.com and use the code MYTOYZZ to receive a 20% discount on your order. They actually have some pretty obscure crap!

The Angry Nintendo Nerd

I met two nice fellows from ScrewAttack.com when I was at E3, as they were kind enough to stop by for a GameTap demo. In any case, they got plugged on Kotaku today, so I was just checking out their website. And this made me LOL: the Angry Nintendo Nerd.

Witness his review of Castlevania II, which he colorfully describes as a "horrible steaming pile of goat shit." Absolutely priceless.

MGS4

You want to talk about the future of entertainment? Instead of debating whether or not video games are the medium of tomorrow, simply watch the extended Metal Gear Solid 4 tailer, and witness the argument come to rest before your very eyes. Seriously, this thing is incredible...and I don't even LIKE the Metal Gear games.


If you can, do yourself a favor and download the 1G HD trailer from IGN. You won't be sorry. Then get ready to put aside $600 for your PS3...

Willie the Warlock

Hellboy Oh Boy

My pal Mario pointed me to this awesome blog about the making of the new Hellboy animated feature.


I had heard this was happening a while ago, but I had no idea that they were so far along. I guess it will be on CN (Adult Swim?) soon.

Mad Props

Sure, they're only about a year late, but Kotaku plugged the MAD "50 Worst Things About Video Games" issue today! That's pretty sweet. Thanks, Kotaku!

Five Alive!

Kotaku was nice enough to point out that GameLife episode 5 is now available for your enjoyment. I salute the kids who make this show, but damn if there isn't a Wesley Willis aspect to watching them.

And is it just me, or is Melissa kind of hot?

CoH vs. WoW

Okay, so you know you're in the right job when your boss tells you: "You need to play World of Warcraft." Well, if I must...

As part of my job helping to design an MMO game, I obviously need to become more familiar with MMOs. Duh. Though I have dabbled in MMO games for a while, my real experience pretty much begins and ends with Guild Wars. So over the last few weeks I have signed up for City of Heroes and World of Warcraft, as well as Disney's Toontown. (Seriously, that's about as much MMO as one person can handle.) So without further ado, I present:


Paragon City in City of Heroes was my first stop. I created my first female character, a hot "magic tanker" named Molly Hatchet. During my initial login, I soloed for a little while to get the lay of the land, and got myself up to level 2 or 3. (I also got myself lost and wound up in a high level area. Whoops!) My impressions were definitely positive; the game has solid controls and the powers system is really interesting and intuitive. When I logged in a second time, I teamed with a bunch of guys on a "sewer mission" -- the sewers are one of the low-level areas near the start of the game, heavily populated with weaker enemies. I spent a couple of hours with this group, and they were all really nice. We were ushered through the environment by a level 32 guy who kept us healed and buffed, so before I knew it, I was at level 7. There was no cursing or noob-bashing. When I said this was my first character, the high level hero told me to add him to my friends list and look him up any time. This was easily the most fun I've had with a bunch of strangers in an MMO environment.

Now it was time to try WoW. After debating Horde vs. Alliance, I decided to go with Horde, as the undead race was too tempting to pass up (I love zombies). Since I almost always go with the "meat shield" warrior class, I decided instead to try a caster class. Hence, my undead warlock named Mordux. He has a big "X" on his face and looks like a badass...for a walking corpse, at least. Moving through the environment for the first time, I was immediately impressed with the design and level of detail in the art. Though it's no Guild Wars, the colorful variety of the environments and monsters (even in the first undead city) was impressive. I tooled around a little bit and killed some guys. Another undead player came up to me and offered me some magic water for a copper. Sure, why not? A little bit later, the same dude came up to me and offered me the same deal. Uh...no, thanks. About five minutes later, the guy challenged me to a duel, which I declined. So he challenged me again. DECLINE. He walked up to me, whispered "pussy!" and took off. Gee, thanks.

So, as you can see, my City of Heroes experience has been significantly more fun than my initial impressions of WoW. You obviously have to give these games time...and I don't have a ton to spare. Complaints about both games: the patches took FOREVER to get me up and running -- in City of Heroes case, over an hour. Also, the essence of any MMORPG -- fighting monsters to level up -- gets old quick. As a single-player guy, I find the combat in both games pretty boring. Perhaps it is the superhero setting, but I liked playing City of Heroes a lot more. The other thing about CoH that I appreciate is the lack of micromanagement of items. Instead, you manage your powers. This is cool. Not so much in WoW. During a few hours of WoW, I collected bat toenails and wolf pelts and worn boots and a bunch of other crap, all of which possesses little, or at the very least, questionable value (until you learn the game's crafting system). It wouldn't matter it I could hold onto all that junk, but my inventory filled up after about five battles. This kind of stuff drives me mad -- I hated it in Guild Wars, too.

Anyway, the MMO genre will never be my favorite, but I can certainly appreciate it more having dug a little deeper into a few of the more popular games. If you have a positive community experience (an MMO's biggest selling point), then you will likely have a grand time and forget how boring the actual gameplay can be.

See you in Paragon City!

It's Awesome Because It Rhymes

Spider Riders: "Discover a lost world where ten-foot-tall spiders battle at your side. Awesome!" P.S. Please buy our shitty toys.

Now That Takes McBalls!

Some guy got up at a UK games convention, and, pretending to be a representative from (the apparently bogus) McDonald's Interactive, declared that a "simulation of the fast-food industry" has predicted that we are heading towards "global calamity". I don't know why they needed a game to predict this, but anyway, you can read the text of the speech here. Talk about stones! Thanks to GSW for the link.

Wakka Wow

This film is lovely and amazing.

Ninja Garnish!

Hey, if you live in New York, you totally have to check out this ninja restaurant. Their special: assassination! Man, the jokes just write themselves...

Game Over

Well, today is my last day at GameTap. It's been an amazing ride.

Cube on the Brain

A friend of mine recently asked me to name my Top Ten favorite Ice Cube tracks. With a recent shoot for GameTap in the bag, and a new album coming out on June 6, Ice Cube is all up in my shit lately.

Top Ten Ice Cube Tracks:
1. The Nigga Ya Love to Hate
2. Jackin' For Beats
3. The Wrong Nigga to Fuck Wit
4. Steady Mobbin'
5. 24 Wit an L
6. It Was a Good Day
7. Down For Whatever
8. You Know How We Do It
9. Wicked
10. Dead Homiez

Note that nothing from the "War & Peace" albums made it, even though I like "Pushin' Weight" from the first one and "You Can Do It" from the second one. Anyway, let's hope the new Cube album is a return to form.

OMG OMG OMG

Awesome! The Wizard is going be released on DVD in August! Weird that I just blogged this only a few weeks ago.

Lost Game

Even though I'm a huge fan of the show, I'm not sure how a game based on Lost could possibly be any good...unless it includes a Hugo peanut-butter-eating minigame.

A Cautionary Tale

Sit back and let me tell you a story. A story about a game called "State of Emergency 2" for the PS2.


I went into this game with zero expectations. (In fact, I haven't even played the first game.) To further substantiate the Schwartz Theory of Low Expectation Media Consumption, my initial reaction to the game was super positive. In fact, SoE2 (as I will call it henceforth) was a blast to play! The game opens with your character inside the death chamber at a prison -- uh oh! Fortunately for him, someone was kind enough to strap a gun to the bottom of his chair. (Yes, check credibility at the door for this one, folks.) Time to make with the carnage!

I should have known something was up when I could not figure out how to exit the FIRST ROOM in the game. Apparently, I did something that prevented the correct story trigger to occur, because once I rebooted and did it again, progress flowed smoothly. The gameplay is typical third-person action: shooting, running, sniping, grenading, ducking around corners. The gimmick here, like in the first game, is that there are a whole lot of NPC characters running around the levels, making for a very chaotic "moblike" atmosphere. Once you bust all the prisoners out of their cells, the game succeeds remarkably well in this area. There are indeed lots of (often identical) chumps running around getting in your way, and woe is the prisoner who gets between you and a guard with a shotgun.

The game is tough. VERY tough. I kept failing the missions, even in the early stages. But unlike GTA, I was not frustrated -- not yet, anyway. Just the opposite: the challenge level was just high enough to make me want to keep trying again and again, without the fun factor diminishing. This is an astonishing achievement, considering modern games often become intolerable when the learning curve is too punishing. (The spinning towers of blades at the end of God of War jump to mind.) In the case of SoE2, the frustration was part of the fun.

Oh, but then how things went wrong. Horribly wrong. Eventually, you break one of your buddies out of prison, and suddenly you have multiple playable characters that you can hotswap during the action. Too bad your buddies are NO FUCKING HELP WHATSOEVER. Too bad there are suddenly CRACKSHOT SNIPERS ON EVERY GUARD TOWER who are all too ready to blow your head off at 2,000 paces. Too bad the levels are IMPOSSIBLY BLAND with nowhere to hide. Too bad it takes FOREVER TO SWITCH WEAPONS. And did I mention that the friendly AI is MADE OF PUDDING?

At a few hours into the game, the punishing challenge suddenly made a hard turn into the No Fun Zone. I started seeing SoE2 it for what it really was: an example of bad programming. Or bad level design, or bad enemy AI, whatever. (Note to developers: enemies that can hit you from across the level when you can't even see them is no longer acceptable.) Frankly, the game had so much going for it. Cool weapons, lots of explosions, a funny delivery and sense of attitude. Not to mention the first scene that takes place inside a DEATH CHAMBER. But ultimately, I turned off my PS2 in a huff and sent the damn game back to GameFly. Who has time for this stuff when there are so many other good games to play?

I love it when an overlooked gem or a budget title, having fallen victim to the oversaturated market, suddenly breaks through and impresses you with its sheer level of quality or awesome budget-ness. Unfortunately, SoE2 is just another game that could have been so much more.

GameTap E3 Picks

GameTap has selected its favorite games from E3 2006. You can also check out a video here.

Slimey

While we're on the subject of Square Enix, take a look at the full checklist of slime keychains:


I got #24, the blue king slime, which is pretty rare, I guess? Anyway, he's definitely a cool one to have!

Yangus: Mysteriously Absent?

So, Young Yangus' Mysterious Dungeon does not seem to be appearing on American shores any time soon, which really sucks. However, something that escaped me at E3 but now has me totally psyched: Square Enix announced Dragon Quest Swords: The Masked Queen and the Tower of Mirrors for release on the Wii. Unclear if it will be an exclusive. The press release says that the Wii hardware is integral to the gameplay, so if they port it to PS3 or whatever it will certainly be a different game in some respect.

Spow!

Those of you who went to E3 and actually had time to see stuff (I hate you) probably already got the full demo of Spore. We knew this game was going to be good, but after watching the 20-minute demo from Will Wright (available in a few places, including good ol' YouTube) I am completely and utterly floored by the game's design and scope. You want to play in a sandbox? How about an entire friggin' UNIVERSE? I have never been a Sims fan (too boring), and though Spore looks somewhat similar it is clearly cut from entirely different cloth. I was really amazed. Watch the whole thing, and avoid the Robin Williams clip if you can. Sorta funny, but totally unnecessary.

It's Official

Well, I can finally announce that I am officially moving into game design. As of May 30 I will be returning to Cartoon Network to work as content designer on a to-be-announced game project. I am extremely excited about this opportunity!

E3 Report

Unfortunately, my report from E3 2006 is a bit Wii'k. This show was a lot more work than I was expecting, with back-to-back media appointments and meetings, not to mention the fact that I was basically on my feet for 12 hours straight all three days. With only 3 or 4 hours to actually hit the floor and check out the wares, I didn't take back nearly as much as I was hoping. That said, I have some impressions to share, with more than a few pleasant surprises and plenty of games that left me salivating. Check out all my pics here.


God of War II: You know, God of War II left me feeling underwhelmed. Yes, it's gorgeous and, yes, it is still fun to play. But as is the case with great games, you hope that the sequel will bring more than just "more of the same" to the table. Based on my limited playtime, I did not see anything new here. The same great graphics, the same tight gameplay, even the same "Kratos falling through the clouds" intro. Maybe I wanted a new weapon? Maybe I wanted a new playable character? I don't know, but while this is definitely going to be a good title, I can't yet say that it will be a great sequel.

Dead Rising: You want a sandbox game? Capcom's got your sandbox game...with zombies. Simply put, this game is a blast to play. Hitting zombies in the skull with a giant LEGO head was worth waiting for, let me tell you. But what about that lazy camera? (Zombies kept sneaking up and biting me in the behind.) What about that annoying photographer dude? (Listen, pal. I don't want to take pictures of you beating zombies. I'd much rather beat you myself.) In a mall environment where everything is a weapon and with gameplay open-ended to the max, this just may be the game that gets me to buy a 360.

Too Human: Speaking of buying a 360, Too Human was on my "must play" short list before heading out to LA. I got the chance to sit down with the game twice, and I was really impressed. Now, keep in mind: the gameplay was very choppy and the load times were unforgivable. This was clearly an early build, and I would venture to guess that Microsoft really had to think hard about whether or not to display this puppy at E3. Well, I'm glad they did, because if you look past its rough edges you can really see the potential of something extraordinary. The controls are quite different, with all of the action orchestrated by the dual analog sticks. The environments were just gorgeous, with some really cool effects and enemies thrown in for good measure. The demo was way too easy, as I got the feeling I could have played through with my eyes closed. Silicon Knights is promising an "easy to learn, difficult to master" mechanic, and if they can deliver, this is going to be an awesome experience.


Spectrobes: Yeah, this game is a Pokemon rip but the creature designs are sweet! And the developer is the company behind Kingdom Hearts for the GBA. So I'm going to keep my eye on this one. Also, Buena Vista has revived the Turok franchise (good) and entered into the weird with the Desperate Housewives game (weird). So what do you care if you gotta catch all them Spectrobes?

Gears of War: Thanks to my friend Greg, I had the opportunity to go behind closed doors with Gears of War to check out the multiplayer deathmatch. Now, I'm mostly a single-player dude, so I was going in a bit skeptical. Let me first say that the game is freaking GORGEOUS. If you're a 3rd person shooter fan, you NEED to check out this game for that reason alone. But, okay, what else does the game offer besides pretty graphics? The only innovation I saw was that the guns had chainsaws on them. (Gone are the days when you had to be saddled with your chainsaw separately. Huzzah!) Seriously, this is next-gen? Freaking chainsaws? I'll wait for the single player, because this looked just like more of the same.


Yakuza: OK, now we're talking. This PS2 exclusive from SEGA is probably just around the corner. Maybe I'm just an old school fogey, but Yakuza was one of the best demos I played at the show: an RPG beat-em-up with real style. Set in the Japanese criminal underground, the title promises some pretty varied gameplay, AWESOME fight controls and elements of "go anywhere, do anything" that may or may not come to fruition. What I can tell you is this: beating a guy over the head with a golf club until it breaks, then smashing the side of his face into a coke machine is just about as cool as it gets.

Prey: There was a lot of buzz around this game leading into E3. Honestly, I played this game at the Microsoft booth because it was one of the few kiosks that was empty when I arrived. Well, I'm glad I played it, because it brings something different to the "been there, done that" feeling that I get from most FPS titles. In fact, I jumped into a deathmatch game and quickly found my footing. The action was fast and fun, and -- get this -- the maps rotate a full 360 degrees. This is hard to explain, but basically, you can run up alongside certain walls and flip the map over. I did not have enough time to figure out the strategy underneath it all, but I did get to see my opponents running on the ceiling like crazed cockroaches. And as far as I'm concerned, running on the ceiling = sign me up!

Full Auto 2: Speaking of deathmatch, I played me some Full Auto 2 deathmatch and I had a freaking blast. (Again, SEGA brings me one of my favorite game experiences of the show.) The controls were a bit dicey until I got a handle (pun intended) on the handbrake. At that point, I could zoom along at full speed with a bogey on my six, do a quick 180 degree turn and blast missiles right into his grill. I don't think this game is going to move any PS3s, but when I get one I will probably make sure Full Auto 2 is on my shelf with it.


DQ Heroes: Rocket Slime: No Dragon Quest Yangus on the floor had me crying in my Alchemy Pot, but this game is a fine substitute. Coming to your DS in September, Rocket Slime is an action/RPG hybrid (lower screen) with giant mecha slimes (top screen) all served up in the inimitable DQ style. Yeah, I'm a bit of a latecomer to the Dragon Quest games, since the only one I've played (other than DQ8) is the original Dragon Warrior for the NES. But who cares? I love this series.

Justice League Heroes: How about this for a surprise? Justice League Heroes is awesome! Developed by Snowblind, the same guys who did the Dark Alliance and Champions of Norrath dungeon crawlers, JLH already has the same spit-and-polish of those games, with a superhero sheen. I played this one at the WBIE booth. I was Superman, the guy from Snowblind was Batman. We totally kicked some robot ass. Perhaps my reaction is due to severely low expectations, but as a comic book fan I am now really looking forward to picking up this game.

Guitar Hero II: What can I say? I've saved the best for last. Guitar Hero II promises to be awesome. I played "YYZ" in co-op mode with some other dude: me on bass, him on lead guitar. It was superb. To activate star power, you and your partner must tilt your guitars simultaneously. This is a lot like the Lifeson-Lee synchronized guitarring of old. I don't think I've ever rocked harder with a video game. Plus, I got a free poster.


Speaking of Guitar Hero II, there's something I have to mention. I was at the Capcom party at Gallery 1988 (where I bought the piece called "Zebes Welcoming Committee" at above right) and they had Guitar Hero customized with the Megaman theme! That was pretty sweet. (They also had the Ikari Warriors theme, but I didn't see anyone from SNK crashing the party.) I see a video game music edition of Guitar Hero coming some day to a console near you...

All told, this was a pretty amazing show. I was disappointed that I did not get to try the Wii. Everyone who walked out of that experience had a big shit-eating grin on their face. (Too bad I did not have the time or the patience to wait for 6 hours to try the damn thing.) Well, I am very happy for Nintendo. They really know how to buck the trend. I am sure some of the games will be gimmicky, but as one friend of mine said, "I've played tennis for real and in video games a million times. But now I get to play it in a whole new way." Can't argue that one, folks.

Other games to watch for are: Assassin's Creed, Spore, Hellgate London, Red Steel, Huxley, Super Smash Bros. Brawl, Twilight Princess (of course) and Command & Conquer 3...among many others.

Now it's time for a nap!